Wednesday, 11 January 2012

Lyrics dump

Say what you will

by ~LifeProtector

lie upside down, let the blood flow to your mind

there's a high you can achieve without any drug

there's not enough in this world to feed our hunger

so say what you will, i won't hold on

they're all back again, the voices and nightmares

they're all here to make me crawl up these walls

she's taking over my mind once again, i'm scared

so say what you will, i won't hold on

i keep seeing what isn't there,

a bit more and i'll be gone

hallucinations, revelations,

christianic propaganda -

all lies

god and angels, biblical angles,

the truth of politicians, the dogmas

i spit at thee

i've seen the evil, it's within us and the society

it's in the eyes of politicians and the priests.

look at that face! could it ever tell truth?

yet we stand by, do nothing and ask why.

so say what you will, i won't hold on

i want no part in this world and life

i'd rather die and leave this place

so say what you will, i won't hold on

hallucinations, revelations,

christianic propaganda -

all lies

god and angels, biblical angles,

the truth of politicians, the dogmas

i spit at thee

where is your god now?

did you really believe in lord and saviour,

heaven, hell and salvation?

where is your god now?

there's no one up there in the clouds.

only lies of one who looks after us.

there's no more need for the nonsense that's religion

who are you to tell me what to believe?

who are thee to tell me lies? i won't believe!

i've got a head upon my shoulders,

i know the world and this life,

so fuck your christian god, he's nonexistent!

hallucinations, revelations,

christianic propaganda -

all lies

god and angels, biblical angles,

the truth of politicians, the dogmas -

i spit at thee

she's in my head, telling me about the death

there are no drugs to drown her out.

and god's nonexistent or awfully cruel

'cause i'm falling apart and have no hope

i've given up

say what you will, i won't hold on

http://lifeprotector.deviantart.com/gallery/?offset=24#/d31bl43
And here's the most bittersweet song of all.

Sunday, 8 January 2012

The best thing that's happened to me so far!

A few weeks ago I heard that a classmate of mine has been trying to write lyrics in English. So I told him that if he needs any help then I'd be happy to give him a hand.

So one evening, he asked me to send him some of my lyrics. I sent three songs.

And today, I received a message from him on facebook saying that he's turning "Pins and Needles" into a song along with his bandmates. They still haven't finished the whole thing but they have done an amateur recording of the base melody and vocals. No words can express my joy! Thank you Max! You've made me very happy, in fact, you've made my day and the whole past week!

Download:

http://www.upload.ee/files/1963591/Greete_Kaar_And_The_AMM_-_Spins_And_Needles.mp3.html

Lyrics:

http://lifeprotector.deviantart.com/art/Pins-And-Needles-251128281?q=gallery%3Alifeprotector%2F18747223&qo=3#/d45ijtl

P.S. I have to admit, his version is mellow while my version would be angry mixed with dirty. But nonetheless it's absolutely fantastic and I'm definitely in heaven!

Monday, 26 December 2011

recently...

All righty, so what is there to tell? Something that would be new?

Well, there's plenty to tell I guess.

Well, let's start off with school and my health. My breathing problem is still pretty prominent, in fact, it's making me weak and I'm thinking about asking the doctor for a leave from P.E. for the rest of the year. Already the thought of P.E. makes me so stressed out I just can't even show up.

Now, Christmas time at school. A classmate of mine gave me condoms as a present, which I found absolutely hilarious! So kudos to her!

Now about Christmas at home... Let's not even talk about that. I'm just glad there was enough alcohol to help me through this hell. I'm so glad I get to leave this place for a while.

Which leads me to another topic... I'm moving in with with my mum's friend Marge. It's obviously a good thing because I finally get to be on my own. Also, I get to live side by side with a person who I've always found awesome. So at least there's one thing that's yay worthy in my life.

And now, some more love for Depeche Mode.

Saturday, 5 November 2011

Kristiina.: Kvaliteetaeg

Kristiina.: Kvaliteetaeg: Tere. Peridoodi lõpp. Neljapäeval käisin särki õmblemas veel lõpuni, istusin koolis mingi viieni ja õmblesin nööpe ette. Väga armas. Muidu ...

Monday, 24 October 2011

http://vimeo.com/terjes

Amazing videos!

Monday, 10 October 2011

My nightmares

Before you begin reading these stories, you should go ahead and download this to set the mood:
http://www.mediafire.com/?d89hvqa9y3jiqx9

My nightmares are getting out of hand once again. Once again I cannot sleep peacefully.

Last night I saw the world after a nuclear holocaust. There was en everlasting winter and night. The few survivors that were left had gone insane.

I made my way from outside into an old metro. There were two platforms and two lines between them. The metro was lit with fluorescent lights and when I looked into the tunnels, all I could see were endless tracks and green light. On one side were about 2-3 people who were insane, but obviously still had some sense of sanity in them.

I made my way to the other side. It was darker over here. The first side had at least a few ceiling lamps turned on but on this side, there wasn't a single one. The only light on this side was that which reached from the opposite platform where I had just come from and even that source of light wasn't enough.

On this side was only one person. I don't remember if we exchanged any words to learn more about each other, but I can remember how I could at least sense how this person had lived on this side of the metro since "the incident" and how this fellow had gone absolutely mad - no sanity was left whatsoever. He kept lurking in the dark, only peeking out behind the corner where he was hiding.

Apparently, one man had followed me to this side from the light side. He tried to turn on the ceiling lamps but before he could do so, the creep told him in a gargling almost whispery voice,"I wouldn't do that if I were you..."

He did anyway and before I knew it, he was engulfed in flames. Alive. There must've been something wrong with the wiring because instead of being able to put the lights on or just getting an electric shock, he was fully on fire.

The smell of burning flesh filled my nose, the screams of this man were too horrifying to stand. I covered my mouth and nose as I watched him suffer. There was no way to save him. The lurker just watched as if he had seen this kind of a sight before.

I still can't get the image and the sound of his screams out of my head. They're stuck in there. Haunting me.

------

Just a few nights before I saw a nightmare where I had a schizophrenic father. He had murdered everybody except me - my mother, my brother and even the neighbours.

I remember going up a flight of stairs, as I was walking I could see blood and severed limbs. Once I had made my way up, I saw my father and he even explained to me what had driven him to do so. The voices.

After that, I ran away. I tried to get as far away as possible. In order to get further from him as fast as possible, I hitchhiked. I didn't have anything on me. I had no money, no clean clothes, I only had the clothes I was wearing. I didn't care, I just needed to escape before I got killed, too.

These dreams remind me of other dreams I've had during my other schizophrenic periods.

In one dream, I was standing on a door's threshold that lead me to a room in a basement. Behind me was a long and narrow hallway.

There was beautiful sunlight coming from a small winow and falling upon a heap of corpses.

Gory corpses. I shut my eyes from the shock of the sight and when I dared to open them again, I was on top of that heap, looking down upon the dead rotting bodies.

As I was gazing down, I could see one man turning his head towards me. It freaked me out as it was proof that some of these weren't corpses after all, they were still alive even if barely! The man was blind and could not see me but he could feel me there. I watched as the maggots were eating his face slowly with one of his cheeks already fully eaten. I looked into his eyes for some time before waking up and realizing that this far too realistic dream was just a dream. It had felt so real.

All I have left are small clips of different dreams. Me walking over a field of corpses, me watching one man cutting open the stomach of another man with his organs bare and falling out. The list goes on...

Kristiina.: Esmaspäev

Kristiina.: Esmaspäev: Tänane päev on nii kiiresti läinud. Üldse kõik on viimasel ajal liiga kiiresti läinud. Ilmselt sellepärast , et nii palju on tegemist olnud....