Last year, there was a guy who I kept talking to. He's a guy who taught me quite a few things about life and made me think about things I would've never thought of before. He was the kind of a guy who wasn't into girls, into dating, all he was interested in was his hobbies and interests. He was the kind of guy who loved maths and physics. And now, months later, I've found myself thinking,"I wish I was like him." And why? Because I wish I was never into boys. I wish I would've never fallen in love, because the whole shit with exes is just so exhausting. I feel as if I've lost so much of myself. I feel as if I gave a lot and the person either took everything or just dumped it all in the trash bin, mockingly smirking at me as he did so. And it'd be so much easier if none of that ever existed. Of course when I was younger I wanted to know what it felt like, and of course it happened, because after all, I'm just a human being. But all in all, I wish I could start anew.
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